It seems like every time I try to make a renewed effort to post substantive material here on a regular basis my schedule goes boink and I get buried in work. Seeing as this is all paying work, I'm not complaining. Really. It beats the hell out of the alternative. In fact, I'd like the fates to note that I am now once again planning on posting here more often. Not just posting, but posting exhaustively researched, intricately structured pieces of such dense verbosity that Glenn Greenwald will send me an e-mail saying simply, "Dood, it's called an editor." Yep. That's my plan.
Now, while I wait for the phone to ring and end up with another dozen projects to work on, a quick thought: am I the only one who finds it kind of hilarious that Rudy Giuliani spent years cultivating his "America's Mayor" image and licking all the GOP boots he thought were appropriate only to find himself sidelined by the likes of Sarah Palin?
Ah, schadenfreude - hope may disappoint, joy is fleeting, but schadenfreude is eternal.
After giving the package zero votes in the House, and 0with their
counterparts in the Senate likely to provide in a crucial procedural
vote today only the handful of votes needed to avoid a filibuster,
Republicans are relishing the opportunity to make a big statement. Rep. Pete Sessions (R-Tex.) suggested last week that the party is learning from the disruptive tactics of the Taliban ...
Emphasis mine. Nom nom nom.
(Substantive blogging later tonight. Don't say I didn't warn you.)
Lindsay Graham just told me America's best days are behind her. Seems a bit dramatic, when you consider that he's just being pissy over the stimulus debate not going his way, but I'm actually relieved - no need to keep busting our ass!
If you're like me, you're absolutely swept up in Groundhog Day mania right now; in order to help you better celebrate this most august of holidays, I've decided to share a story with you of Groundhog Days past.
Several years ago I was hired to cover the Groundhog Day festivities in Punxsatawney, PA. (These are same festivities immortalized in the Bill Murray film Groundhog Day.) For reasons known only to those who give a damn about such things, Punxsatawney Phil is the groundhog of record when it comes to Groundhog Day predictions, and if you've never seen one of the Groundhog Day festivals you have no idea how genuinely weird they get. Thousands - literally thousands - of people show up at 5:00 AM and stand in the rural Pennsylvania cold waiting to catch a glimpse of Phil. Apparently, you have to show up that early in order to get a good spot. (Remember that bit - it's going to become important in a minute.)
By the time the "town elders" in top hats and black frock coats roll out the fake tree stump with the groundhog stuffed in it, these thousands of people are desperate for something interesting happen. Actually, considering that they showed up at 5:00 AM for frikkin' groundhog, they've probably been waiting for something interesting to happen for a lot longer than that. Anyway, the very sight of the town elders drives the crowd into a frenzy, a rabid clamoring, a knot of orgiastic tension that can only be released when some old guy in a top hat whacks a fake tree stump with a hickory cane, opens it up, and hoists a groundhog up in the air over the crowd like it's the newly-born Lion King.
Now, this groundhog, who spends the bulk of his year as a pampered pet, only to one morning suddenly find himself rudely stuffed into a fake tree stump for God knows how long and then hoisted over a crowd of screaming Pennsylvanians, reacts in the only sensible way a groundhog can: he loses bladder control.
Groundhog pee was everywhere. It was remarkable. It was like this little rodent was eighty percent bladder or something. People in the front row were getting soaked. If GG Allin were a groundhog, this is probably how his shows would have looked.
If a face full of groundhog pee ain't worth getting up at 5:00 AM for, well, then I don't know what is.